Hyvää uutta vuotta - Happy New Year

FIN - Tällä viikolla ei tule tarinanpätkää henkilökohtaisista syistä. Joulukiireiden lisäksi perhepiirissä menehtyi lemmikki enkä ole pystynyt keskittymään kirjoittamiseen. Yritän saada luvun valmiiksi ensi viikoksi. Surullisesta vuoden päätöksestä huolimatta odotan alkavaa vuotta positiivisella mielellä. Toivottavasti uusi vuosi tuo hyvää mukanaan itse kullekin.

ENG - There won't be a new chapter this week due to personal reasons. After the busy Christmas holidays we suffered the loss of a beloved pet in my family and I haven't been able to set my mind to writing. I'll try to finish the next chapter for next week. Despite the sad ending for the year 2015, I have hope and positive thoughts for the coming year. I hope the new year will bring good news to each and everyone of us.

Armaran chapter 11

FIN - Katsotaan kuinka käy seuraavan päivityksen, koska se osuisi juurikin Uuteen vuoteen. Toivotan kuitenkin kaikille rauhallista joulua! (Onneksi suomenkielessä ei ole samanlaista uskonnollista pelleilyä kuin englanninkielisessä joulussa, vaikka meillä onkin väännetty jo useita vuosia kättä mm. Suvivirren laulamisesta kevätjuhlissa. En itse tunnusta mitään uskontoa, mutta minusta kristinusko on silti huomattavan suuri tekijä kulttuurissamme)

ENG - We'll see if the next update will actually be right before New Year's. I wish you all a peaceful Christmas! (and don't get all troller-loller because I used the C-word, I'm not religious but I see Christianity as a great force in the cultures of most Western-civilised nations)

Armaran chapter 11

Amina walked towards the school, nervous. Mr. Streckke had been praising Ms. Slava some more over the breakfast, but Amina's first impression of the woman wasn't quite as flattering. She was also worried what the other children would think of her. People with children seldom moved to Tenera, so all of the children had known each other for several years.

Amina saw a couple of children entering the school building. As her eyes met the door, she remembered the inscriptions above it. This time she could stop in front of the door to take a better look at them.

As she was trying to read the letters, a boy behind her said: ”It's no use if you don't know Universal.”

Amina turned to look and saw a boy perhaps two years older than herself. He was wearing clean and nice clothes and his hair had obviously been combed in the morning. ”I know only Armaranian,” she said even though he didn't ask.

He shrugged. ”I haven't learned all the words myself yet, but it's some kind of historical phrase,” he said and walked in past her.

Amina followed him and walked straight to the big room. It was a classroom and small tables had been grouped in each corner. Some children seemed to be sitting with other children of their own age, but others were perhaps the wealthier children. Amina had no idea where to sit.

Ms. Slava entered the room and clapped her hands to get everyone's attention and to quiet them down. ”We have a new student today. Her name is Amina,” she said audibly and nodded towards Amina. ”Please, sit down by the window,” she said to Amina.

Amina walked slowly and quite hesitantly through the classroom. Beside the windows, there were two separate school desks. She could feel everyone's eyes on her back.

Ms. Slava had begun to give out instructions to one table and proceeded quickly and efficiently around the classroom. When she was done with everyone else, she came to Amina and explained to her what she wanted her to learn on that day.

Amina listened carefully to the teacher's instructions and started with her letters straight away. From time to time, she showed all the characters she had scribbled to Ms. Slava, who very patiently pointed out all the errors and gave her advice on how to improve her hand. During lunch break one of the girls Amina had met the day before promised to borrow her a small chalkboard so she could practice Ms. Slava's frilly letters also at home, as the girl had done herself. Amina thanked her and was happy to have been able to get to know someone a little better.

On the second day, Amina spent very little time practicing writing letters. Ms. Slava had prepared simple mathematical problems for her to solve, and it took most of her day to get them done. During lunch break she had another chance to speak with some of the girls she had met before. A couple of boys kept interrupting them. As she didn't watch over the children during their break time, the boys wouldn't run away even when the girls threathened to tell Ms. Slava.

Amina didn't find the situation intimidating in any way, or perhaps not even bullying at all, as it was nothing worse than what she'd seen or experienced in Groshna. In general, boys were stupid most of the time, but they were better at getting themselves rather than others hurt.

On the third day, Ms. Slava made Amina read aloud in front of the entire class. Amina had found out that the tables were arranged according to the level of the students which meant that most of them were sitting next to children of their own age. Amina felt like being bullied as she was reading in front of everyone, but a teacher couldn't be a bully, could she? Amina managed to read better than in Ms. Slava's office a few days earlier. Some of the boys tried to interrupt her, but Ms. Slava wouldn't let anything disrupt her class and gave the boys triple homework staright away and more would follow if they didn't stop immediately. It silenced the boys efficiently.

After Amina finished reading the text, Ms. Slava asked some of the older and more advanced students for feedback on Amina's talent. Amina was terrified. She had not expected anyone but the teacher to evaluate her skills.

The boy who was studying the text above the door stood up instantly. His remarks were kind and encouraging and he emphasized Amina's potential to improve her talent. One of the first things Amina had noticed about him was that he seemed to be far more educated than any other student. One of the girls had told her that he spent only winters in Tenera and that he probably had a private tutor in the city for every summer. Ms. Slava was nodding to his comments and asked the opinion of a few other students. No one said anything half as kind about Amina as the first boy.

When she left school, Amina was thinking what true erudition and civility was. She decided it was a combination of knowledge and sophistication. You could be polite and well-behaved without education, but someone with a degree should be courteous in every occasion and to everyone, as such people should have the understanding of those less privileged and therefore less civilized. She wasn't about to have a crush on the cityboy but she esteemed him greatly.

Amina lost the track of her thoughts as someone pushed her hard on the back and she fell on her face. She could feel the skin on her palms scraping with sand and her knees were smarting.

Three boys were standing behind her, laughing and shouting insults at her.

Amina got up on her knees and looked at the palms of her hands. There were no scratches or marks of any kind left on them. She felt little tingling on her cheek but it ended as soon as it began. Praie. Amina got on her feet with her back at the boys who were still calling her names and laughing. She turned to face them. ”Was that a push? I didn't even notice it because I was lost in my thoughts and stumbled on a rock,” she said defiantly.

The boys stopped laughing. ”Teacher's pet!” ”Stupid country kid!” ”Miserable orphan!”

Amina wondered if she'd have started to cry after hearing such things if it wasn't for Praie. She raised her hands in the air. ”It didn't hurt at all and I didn't even get scrapes. I guess you townboys are just too weak since you can't even push a girl over.”

The boys were serious. They were certainly used to girls crying and any victim having some part of them bloodied.

”Oh, look! No bruises at all!” Amina said and raised her hem enough to show her unharmed knees.

The boys were glancing at one another annoyed and confused. One of them picked up a rock and tossed it in his hands for a while. When he hoped Amina was focused on something else he tossed it at her as hard as he could.

Amina's hand got up in a flash and caught the rock in midair. ”And look how slow you are. You sure wouldn't survive if you didn't have your mamas wiping your butts!” Amina tried to come up with insults as juvenile as the ones the boys had thrown at her.

The boy who tossed the rock was staring at her hand and the rock in awe, perhaps even a little fearfully. He was backing away slowly. One of his friends called him a coward. Amina threw the rock to his toes swiftly. His eyes watered and he bit his lip so he wouldn't cry out loud. He turned and limped as fast as he could. The third boy followed immidiately after losing the support of his friends.

Amina stood still a minute, breathing slowly in and out. ”You didn't have to hurt him, you know,” she whispered softly. Praie disagreed. However, it said it interfered only because the boys were disrupting its peace of mind. Amina wondered if Praie was being so childish because she was a child, or if all Gahim were as annoying moping beings. Praie had already returned to its gloom at the back of her head and didn't care about her thoughts anymore.

Something rustled in the undergrowth. Amina didn't have to see it, she could tell from the sole feeling that it was a Gahim. It didn't want to show itself so Amina whispered ”Gahim arimma hajahka” and carried on.

Amina told no one at the Streckke house about what had happened. If the boys wanted her to be punished for defending herself, she'd gladly tell everyone what they had done. On the other hand, she had no marks left on her body to prove anything. Only some dirt had smudged her dress.

***

It was raining on the fourth day of school and Amina was scribbling more letters. Ms. Slava told her she'd be placed at one of the tables after the next days off. She was also explaining in detail what they'd be doing on the next day for the common good. Amina listened carefully and prepared in the evening. Ms. Slava had told her that if it was still rainy, they'd be helping some of the older residents by cleaning their houses. If the weather was dry, they'd be filling some holes in the road near the town.

The next morning was cloudy but dry. Amina asked the house maid for a shawl in case it started to rain later. As she arrived at the school, she saw many of the students waiting outside. Some were clearly prepared to stay indoors, others seemed better prepared for wet weather. Amina had a chance to speak with some of the girls before Ms. Slava stepped out.

”Come closer, please! I don't want to have to shout!” Ms. Slava said in an audible voice.

The children gathered around the door.

”The weather today is better than yesterday, but it looks like it might rain again any minute. Those of you who don't want to be outdoors, please form small groups and go help the elderly. The rest of you, please come with me to the smithy. We will get the tools we need there,” Ms. Slava instructed them.

Most of the girls went to help the elderly. Most of the younger students stayed out with a handful of older students. Amina was vexed by the fact that the bullying boys were staying outside. However, so was Eric the civilized boy.

Ms. Slava led the way to the smithy.

A muscular and soot-covered man was waiting for them at the door. He used very few but polite words as he gave them shovels, buckets, and a wooden wheelbarrow.

Ms. Slava nodded at the man coldly, wrinkling her nose.

They headed out of town to a great hole that had been dug up in the gravely soil. They filled the buckets and the wheelbarrow with gravel. The holes they were to fill were a little farther away from town. All the students were silent under the watchful eye of Ms. Slava. Even though she hardly did anything but instruct the students what to do, Amina was certain she'd be the one to get all the praise for the good deed her students in fact did.

After all of the gravel had been poured into the holes, Ms. Slava inspected their work. She sent the older students to get another batch of gravel on their own.

They bully boys were visibly annoyed that Ms. Slava stayed in watch of the younger ones. Amina was happy even though she had no one to talk to. To muse herself, she began to recite the story she had told the spirits when she wanted them to remember the language of Armaran.

Youngest students gathered around her to listen even though most of them knew the story already, as they had so few chances to hear them.

Ms. Slava was standing a little further away but Amina was certain she was listening to the story.

After Amina finished, a little boy asked her whether she knew any other stories.

Amina thought for a moment whether it would be wise to share her heritage. She had always been proud of her parents and their talent as storytellers, but the Fatil were still not welcome in some parts of Armaran. ”I am Fatil. Or I will be some day. I know most of the stories in my family and I'm going to learn the rest of them before I grow up,” she replied.

The little boy got very excited. ”Can you tell another one?”

Amina glanced at Ms. Slava from the corner of her eye. The teacher had turned to face her. ”Maybe later. I'm sure we'll get more gravel real soon,” Amina said.

A few minutes later the older students returned with more gravel and they carried on their work.

Ms. Slava inspected the results again. ”This should be enough for today. The next rain will reveal if there is need for more gravel. We will head back to town. Eric and Joseph, will you be as kind as to return the tools?” she asked of the oldest boys.

Eric sighed and Joseph sneered. ”Sure,” Eric replied, but Joseph protested: ”We can't take all these at once!”

Amina volunteered to help. Many of the children looked at her as though she was deranged, but were happy that their help was not needed.

However, Ms. Slava ordered an additional boy to help them. She headed swiftly back towards Tenera and left the children to find their own way back.

The bully boys sneered at Amina and sprinted back home. Other children began to move towards town as well.

Eric and Joseph loaded as many tools as they could on the wheelbarrow and divided the rest between the four of them. Their progress was slow and downbeat.

Eventually Eric broke the silence. ”Why did you want to help? There are rarely any volunteers,” he asked Amina.

Amina shrugged. ”I've got to know most of Armaran in a few days but I'm still unfamiliar with the smithy.”

Eric seemed a little surprised. ”Do you always want to get acquainted with the entire village where you live?”

Amina shook her head. ”The smithy tells a lot about a village. The blacksmith does a lot of important work that some people overlook. For instance, if a hammer is poorly made, even the best carpenter can't make the best buildings with it.”

Eric thought for a moment. ”Did I understand correctly: You volunteered to help us take back the tools to the smithy in order to get a better look at it and perhaps say hello to the blacksmith?”

Amina nodded. ”Ms. Slava is obviously disgusted by working men. And I don't think Mr. Streckke appriciates them much, either. But just because you don't like somebody, doesn't mean you have to be rude to them. Many people don't like the Fatil, but that never stopped my family from traveling to that kinda places. My daddy always said, that we don't have to tell stories where people don't like them, but they don't have to shun us, when we don't bother them.”

”Are you really a Fatil?” the additional boy asked.

Eric and Joseph looked at Amina with curiosity.

”Yes, I am. And I like to tell the stories. My own favourites are about General Stenvil,” Amina replied. ”In the last village where I lived, the chargé d'affaires said that acoording to the town rules, I'm too young to perform, but I was thinking about asking about it here, too. Whenever the next town fair is, I'm going to tell stories, if I get a permission.”

”You should ask Ms. Slava as well. She is very rigorous about her students free time,” Eric adviced.

Amina thanked him with a smile.

As they reached Tenera, they saw immediately that the smithy was closed. Joseph tried the handle but the door was locked. ”Why is everything against me today...” he swore.

They waited for several minutes but there was no sight of the blacksmith, and it began to drizzle.

Amina promised to stay and wait for him so everyone else could go home.

Jospeh and the additional boy left immediately, but Eric stayed a while longer and before leaving asked Amina again if she'd be okay on her own.

Amina didn't have to wait by herself for long, and the blacksmith was very sorry for the wait.

Amina assured him she didn't mind and told the blacksmith about herself and Jared.

He was a kind man even though he didn't know Jared. He was obviously used to being treated with condescension but it didn't bother him. He had lived in Tenera all his life and while he was the apprentice, he had fallen in love with the blacksmith's daughter. They got married but she died a few years later. The heart-broken blacksmith had left the smithy to his apprentice and moved to live with his nephew in a city.

Amina listened with interest and compassion to the events of his life and told in return about her fate as an orphan.

The blacksmith promised her she could come over at any time.

Amina returned to the Streckke house happy even though she got soaked on the way.

The house maid sent her straight to her room to get changed and then to dinner.

”Good evening, my love,” Mr. Streckke greeted her when she finally managed to get to the dining room. ”How was your day?”

Amina smiled and sat down at the table. ”It was interesting to go outside of town even though filling the holes wasn't all that facinating. It's too bad it started to rain again. I waited at the smithy to return the tools because I didn't think it would take long, and everyone else could go home,” Amina described her day.

Mrs. Streckke smiled at her. ”Oh, aren't you the sweetest.”

”Indeed, almost a noble act from your part! I could not stay a moment too long near that horrid smelly building!” Streckke's son bemoaned.

Amina was still nervous about the young man's skeletal appearence and avoided him as much as she could.

The conversation was immediately moving on, and Amina was as good as forgotten. She didn't mind it as she was just a guest.

When she returned to her room, Amina decided to write to Jared and Kros. She wanted to tell them both about her meeting with the blacksmith and about everything that had happened during her first week in Tenera. She was facing to days with nothing to do. Praie was still keeping to itself and Amina was fine with it.

Armaran 11. luku

Amina käveli hermostuneena kohti koulua. Herra Streckke oli aamiaisella kehunut lisää neiti Slavaa, mutta Aminan ensivaikutelma naisesta ei ollut erityisen mairitteleva. Häntä hermostutti myös toisten lasten suhtautuminen itseensä. Teneraan ei usein muuttanut uusia lapsia ja kaikki muut olivat tunteneet toisensa vuosia.

Amina näki parin muun lapsen menevän sisään kouluun. Vilkaistessaan ovea hän muisti, että sen päälle seinään oli kirjoitettu jotain. Tällä kertaa hän pysähtyi ennen sisään astumista ja yritti lukea kaiverretut kirjaimet.

”Ei kannata, josset osaa yleiskieltä,” pojan ääni kuului hänen takaansa.

Amina kääntyi ja näki itseään pari vuotta vanhemman siististi puetun pojan. Pojan hiukset oli selvästi kammattu aamulla. ”Osaan vain armarania,” Amina sanoi, vaikkei poika ollut sitä kysynyt.

Poika kohautti olkiaan. ”En itse osaa vielä kaikkia sanoja, mutta se on jonkinlainen historiallinen lausahdus,” hän totesi ja käveli Amina ohi sisään kouluun.

Amina seurasi ja tällä kertaa hän käveli suoraan käytävän loppuun. Isompaan tilaan oli rakennettu luokkahuone, jossa pieniä pöytiä oli ryhmitelty eri nurkkiin. Jotkut lapset vaikuttivat istuvan ikäistensä joukossa, osa mahdollisesti rikkaampien pöydässä, eikä Amina tiennyt mihin mennä.

Neiti Slava saapui pian luokkaan ja taputti käsiään pari kertaa huomion saamiseksi ja oppilaiden hiljentämiseksi. ”Joukkoomme liittyy tänään uusi oppilas Amina,” hän sanoi kuuluvalla äänellä ja nyökkäsi Aminan suuntaan. ”Ole hyvä ja istu ikkunan viereen,” hän sanoi Aminalle.

Amina käveli hitaasti empien luokan läpi. Ikkunoiden viereen oli aseteltu pari yksinäistä pulpettia. Hän tunsi kaikkien oppilaiden katseet itsessään.

Neiti Slava oli alkanut jakaa ohjeita yhteen pöytäryhmään ja hän kävi nopeasti ja tehokkaasti läpi loputkin. Lopulta hän pysähtyi Aminan eteen ja selitti mitä halusi tämän oppivan sinä päivänä.

Amina kuunteli ohjeet tarkkaan ja alkoi heti harjoitella kirjaimia. Hän kävi välillä näyttämässä raapustuksiaan neiti Slavalle, joka kärsivällisesti selitti mikä niissä oli väärin ja neuvoi miten hän voisi parantaa käsialaansa. Lounastunnilla yksi tytöistä, jonka Amina oli tavannut edellisenä päivänä, lupasi lainata hänelle pientä liitutaulua, jonka avulla hän itse oli opetellut kotonakin neiti Slavan vaatimia koukeroita. Amina kiitti ja oli hyvillään, koska oli onnistunut ainakin tutustumaan johonkuhun.

Toisena päivänä Amina harjoitteli kirjaimia vain vähän. Neiti Slava oli valmistellut hänelle laskutehtäviä, joihin meni suuri osa päivästä. Lounastunnilla Amina jutteli taas parin aiemmin tapaamansa tytön kanssa, mutta muutama poika keskeytti heidät vähän väliä. Neiti Slava ei vahtinut lapsia lounasaikaan, joten pojat eivät juosseet karkuun, vaikka tytöt uhkasivat kertoa opettajalle. Aminasta tilanne ei ollut uhkaava eikä varsinaisesti kiusaamista – ainakaan mitään pahempaa kuin mitä hän oli nähnyt ja kokenut Groshnassa. Pojat olivat usein todella typeriä, mutta satuttivat useammin itsensä kuin muita.

Kolmantena päivänä Amina joutui lukemaan ääneen koko luokan edessä. Hänelle oli selvinnyt, että pöytäryhmät olivat pääasiassa jaettu lasten osaamistason mukaan, mikä tarkoitti suurimmalle osalle istumista omanikäistensä joukossa. Kaikille yhtä aikaa lukeminen tuntui kiusaamiselta, mutta eihän opettaja voisi kiusata. Lopulta Amina selviytyi lukemisesta paremmin kuin muutama päivä aiemmin neiti Slavan toimistossa. Pari poikaa yritti häiritä hänen lukemistaan, mutta neiti Slava oli tiukka kaikista häiriöistä luokassaan ja määräsi heti pojille kolminkertaiset läksyt ja lisää tulisi, jos he jatkaisivat. Se hiljensi pojat heti.

Aminan lopetettua lukemisen neiti Slava pyysi vanhemmilta ja edistyneemmiltä oppilailta palautetta Aminan kyvyistä. Amina oli kauhuissaan. Hän ei ollut odottanut muiden kuin opettajan arvioivan omaa osaamistaan.

Oven päällistä tekstiä opetteleva poika nousi heti seisomaan. Hänen huomionsa olivat ystävällisiä ja kannustavia ja hän korosti Aminan mahdollisuuksia kehittää kykyjään. Amina oli jo aiemmin todennut, että poika vaikutti huomattavasti koulutetummalta kuin kukaan muu oppilas. Yksi tytöistä oli kertonut, että hän asui vain talvet Tenerassa ja että hänellä oli ehkä yksityisopettaja kaupungissa.

Neiti Slava nyökytteli pojan kommenteille ja pyysi vielä parilta muulta mielipidettä. Kukaan muu ei ollut yhtä kiltti kommenteissaan kuin ensimmäinen poika.

Koulusta lähtiessään Amina mietti, mitä sivistys ja oppineisuus olivat. Hän päätti, että niissä piti yhdistyä tieto ja kohteliaat tavat. Kohtelias saattoi toki olla ilman tietoakin, mutta opiskelleen ihmisen pitäisi kyetä olemaan erityisen kohtelias aina ja kaikille. Koulutetuilta pitäisi riittää ymmärrystä vähemmän oppineille, koska näillä ei ollut mahdollisuutta tulla yhtä sivistyneiksi. Hän ei ollut ihastumassa kaupunkilaispoikaan, mutta alkoi arvostaa tätä hyvänä ihmisenä.

Aminan ajatukset katkesivat, kun joku tönäisi häntä kovaa selkään ja hän kaatui kasvoilleen maahan. Hän tunsi heti, että hänen kämmeniensä iho meni rikki ja polvia kirveli.

Muutama poika hänen takanaan nauroi äänekkäästi ja huuteli loukkauksia.

Amina nousi polvilleen ja vilkaisi kämmeniään. Niissä ei ollut jälkeäkään. Hän tunsi pientä kihelmöintiä poskessaan, mutta sekin loppui nopeasti. Praie. Amina nousi seisomaan edelleen selin poikiin, jotka jatkoivat nimittelyä ja naureskelua. Hän kääntyi heitä kohti. ”Oliko se tönäisy? En edes huomannut, kun kuljin niin ajatuksissani ja kompastuin juuri kiveen,” hän sanoi uhmakkaasti.

Poikien nauru loppui heti. ”Opettajan lellikki!” ”Tyhmä maalainen!” ”Onneton orpo!”

Amina mietti olisiko hän ilman Praiea alkanut itkeä sellaisten sanojen takia. Hän nosti kätensä ilmaan kämmenet poikia kohti. ”Ei sattunut yhtään eikä tullut edes naarmuja. Taidatte te kyläläispojat olla tosi heikkoja, kun ette osaa edes kaataa yhtä tyttöä.”

Pojat vakavoituivat. He olivat varmasti tottuneet itkeviin tyttöhin ja verisiin jälkiin vähintään jossain osassa uhria.

”Eikä muuten tullut edes mustelmia!” Amina sanoi ja nosti hameensa helmaa sen verran, että hänen täysin vauriottomat polvensa paljastuivat.

Pojat vilkuilivat näreissään ja ymmällään toisiaan. Yksi poimi kiven maasta ja pallotteli sitä hetken kädessään. Toivoessaan Aminan huomion olevan keskittynyt johonkin muuhun hän paiskasi sen tyttöä päin niin lujaa kuin pystyi.

Aminan käsi nousi salamannopeasti ja nappasi kiven kesken lennon. ”Ja hitaitakin olette. Ette te vaan selviytyisi jokapäivisestä elämästä, jos teillä ei olisi äitejä pyyhkimässä teidän pyllyjä!” Amina yritti keksiä poikamaisia loukkauksia, jotka vastaisivat tasoltaan poikien aiemmin heittelemiä.

Kiven heittänyt poika tuijotti ällistyneenä ja jopa hieman kauhuissaan Aminan kättä ja kiveä. Hän alkoi perääntyä hitaasti. Toinen hänen kavereistaan haukkui häntä pelkuriksi, mutta Amina nakkasi kiven tämän varpaisiin rivakalla liikkeellä. Pojan silmät täyttyivät kyynelistä ja hän puri huultaan, ettei vaikeroisi kivusta. Hän lähti rivakasti nilkuttamaan pois päin ja kolmas poika seurasi nopeasti menetettyään ryhmänsä tuen.

Amina seisoi hetken paikoillaan ja hengitti monta kertaa syvään. ”Ei sinun olisi tarvinnut satuttaa häntä,” hän kuiskasi hiljaa. Praie oli eri mieltä. Se väitti kuitenkin, ettei olisi sekaantunut, mutta pojat häiritsivät kovasti sen omaa rauhaa. Amina mietti oliko Praie lapsellinen sen takia, että hän oli itse lapsi, vai olivatko kaikki Gahim niin ärsyttäviä murjottajia. Praie oli kuitenkin palannut omaan synkkään nurkkaansa Aminan mielen perukoille eikä enää välittänyt hänen ajatuksistaan.

Pensaikossa rapisi jotain. Aminan ei tarvinnut kääntyä katsomaan. Hän tiesi jo pelkästä tunteesta, että se oli Gahim. Se ei kuitenkaan tullut esiin, joten Amina jatkoi matkaansa kuiskattuaan ”Gahim arimma hajahka”.

Amina ei kertonut kellekään Streckkejen talossa tapahtuneesta. Jos pojat tahtoisivat hänelle rangaistusta itsensä puolustamisesta, hän olisi valmis kertomaan heidän teoistaan. Toisaalta hänellä ei ollut jälkiä itsessään todistamassa kaatumisesta. Ainoastaan hänen helmaansa oli tarttunut tien tomua.

***

Neljäs koulupäivä oli sateinen ja Amina harjoitteli jälleen kirjaimia. Neiti Slava kertoi päättävänsä seuraavien vapaapäivien aikana mihin ryhmään hän sijoittaisi Aminan ja selitti hänelle yksityiskohtaisesti seuraavan päivän eli yhteisen toiminnan kulkua. Amina kuunteli ohjeet huolella ja valmistautui illalla. Neiti Slava oli sanonut, että jos seuraavakin päivä olisi sateinen, he menisivät auttamaan paria vanhempaa kylän asukasta heidän talojensa siivoamisessa. Sään ollessa poutainen he lähtisivät täyttämään tiehen syntyneitä koloja kylän lähelle.

Aamu valkeni pilvisenä, mutta enää ei satanut. Amina pyysi sisäköltä paksua huivia mukaan siltä varalta, että päivemmällä alkaisi sataa. Saapuessaan koululle hän näki useita oppilaita odottamassa ulkona. Osa heistä oli selvästi varautunut viettämään koko päivän sisällä, toiset taas olivat varautuneet olemaan ulkona märässä. Amina ehti jutella tuttujen tyttöjen kanssa hetken ennen kuin neiti Slava astui ulos.

”Tulkaa lähemmäs, jotta minun ei tarvitse huutaa!” neiti Slava kutsui kuuluvalla äänellä.

Lapset kerääntyivät lähelle portaita.

”Sää on parempi kuin eilen, mutta sade saattaa alkaa milloin vain. Ne teistä, jotka eivät halua olla ulkona voivat lähteä pienissä ryhmissä auttamaan vanhuksia. Loput tulevat kanssani sepänpajalle, josta saamme mukaamme tarvittavat työkalut,” neiti Slava ohjeisti.

Suurin osa tytöistä lähti auttamaan vanhuksia. Suurin osa nuorimmista oppilaista jäi ulos ja lisäksi pari vanhempaa oppilasta. Aminaa harmitti, että häntä kiusanneet pojat olivat tulossa mukaan korjaamaan kuoppia. Joukossa oli myös sivistynyt poika Eric.

Neiti Slava johti ryhmän sepänpajan luo.

Lihaksikas, noenpeittämä mies odotti heitä ovella. Hän tarjosi vähäsanaisesti, mutta kohteliaasti heille lapioita ja ämpäreitä sekä yhdet puiset kottikärryt.

Neiti Slava nyökkäsi miehelle kylmästi ja nenäänsä nyrpistellen.

He suuntasivat seuraavaksi kylän ulkopuolelle kaivetun suuren kuopan luo ja täyttivät kottikärryt ja ämpärit sen soralla. Täytettävät kuopat olivat vielä vähän kauempana kylästä. Kaikki oppilaat olivat hiljaa neiti Slavan valvovan silmän alla. Vaikka nainen ei vielä ollut itse tehnyt mitään vaan ainoastaan ohjeistanut oppilaitaan, Amina oli varma, että naista kiiteltäisiin hyvistä töistä, jotka hänen oppilaansa todellisuudessa tekivät.

Kun sorakuormat oli tyhjennetty kuoppiin, neiti Slava tarkasteli tilannetta ja lähetti vanhimmat oppilaat hakemaan toista erää soraa itsenäisesti.

Aminaa kiusanneet pojat olivat selvästi harmissaan, että opettaja jäi vahtimaan heitä. Amina oli tyytyväinen, vaikkei hänellä ollut ketään tuttua, jonka kanssa jutella. Hän alkoi huvikseen lausua läpi tarinaa, jonka hän oli kertonut hengille, jotta ne muistaisivat armaranin kielen uudelleen.

Nuorimmat oppilaat kerääntyivät kuuntelemaan, vaikka tarina oli monille heistä tuttu, sillä heillä oli harvoin mahdollisuus kuulla tarinoita.

Neiti Slava seisoi hieman etäämmällä, mutta Amina huomasi tämänkin kuuntelevan tarinaa.

Aminan lopetettua pieni poika kysyi häneltä osasiko hän muitakin tarinoita.

Amina mietti hetken olisiko hänen järkevää kertoa taustastaan. Hän oli aina ollut ylpeä vanhemmistaan ja heidän taidoistaan tarinankertojina, mutta Fatilit eivät olleet edelleenkään tervetulleita kaikissa osissa Armarania. ”Minä olen Fatil. Tai minusta tulee joku päivä. Osaan jo suurimman osan sukuni tarinoista ja aion oppia loputkin ennen kuin kasvan isoksi,” Amina vastasi.

Pieni poika innostui suunnattomasti. ”Voitko kertoa lisää?”

Amina vilkaisi nopeasti neiti Slavaa, joka oli kääntynyt katsomaan häntä. ”Ehkä myöhemmin. Saamme varmasti ihan kohta lisää soraa kuoppiin.”

Muutamaa minuuttia myöhemmin vanhemmat oppilaat palasivat sorakuorman kanssa ja he jatkoivat työtään.

Neiti Slava tarkasti jälleen työn jälkiä. ”Tämä riittää tältä päivältä. Seuraava sade paljastaa paremmin tarvitseeko jokin kuoppa lisää soraa. Palaamme takaisin kylään. Eric ja Joseph, olisitteko ystävällisiä ja palauttaisitte työkalut?” hän kysyi vanhimmilta pojilta.

Eric huokaisi ja Joseph irvisti. ”Totta kai,” Eric mutisi, mutta Joseph protestoi: ”Emme saa kaikkia näitä vietyä kahdestaan!”

Amina ilmoittautui vapaaehtoiseksi auttamaan. Monet lapset katsoivat häntä kummeksuen, mutta olivat varmasti tyytyväisiä siitä, ettei heidän apuaan tarvittu.

Neiti Slava käski kuitenkin vielä yhden lapsen auttamaan heitä. Hän lähti sitten kävelemään rivakasti takaisin kohti kylää ja jätti lapset keskenään.

Aminaa aiemmin kiusanneet pojat irvailivat hänelle ja lähtivät sitten juoksemaan kotiin. Muutkin lapset suuntasivat heti takaisin.

Eric ja Joseph asettelivat niin paljon työkaluja kottikärryihin kuin vain suinkin saivat pysymään niiden kyydissä ja jakoivat loput Aminalle ja neiti Slavan määräämälle pojalle kannettaviksi.

Heidän kulkunsa oli hidasta ja apeaa.

Lopulta Eric rikkoi hiljaisuuden. ”Miksi halusit auttaa? Kukaan harvoin ilmoittautuu vapaaehtoiseksi töihin,” hän kysyi Aminalta.

Amina kohautti olkiaan. ”Olen tutustunut suureen osaan Tenerasta muutamassa päivässä, mutta sepänpaja on minulle vielä tuntematon.”

Eric vaikutti hieman yllättyneeltä. ”Haluatko aina tuntea koko kylän, jossa asut?”

Amina pudisti päätään. ”Sepänpaja kertoo paljon kylästä. Seppä tekee paljon tärkeitä töitä, joita kaikki eivät aina arvosta. Jos vaikka vasara on huono, sillä on huono rakentaa, vaikka rakentaja olisi tosi hyvä.”

Eric mietti hetken. ”Ymmärsinkö oikein: ilmoittauduit vapaaehtoiseksi palauttamaan työkaluja pajalle, jotta voisit nähdä sen sisältä ja ehkä tervehtiä seppää?”

Amina nyökkäsi. ”Neiti Slava ei selvästi pidä työläisistä. Eikä taida pitää herra Streckkekään. Mutta vaikka ei pitäisi jostakusta, ei silti tarvitse olla töykeä. Monet eivät pidä Fatileista, mutta se ei koskaan estänyt minun perhettäni matkustamasta niihin paikkoihin. Isä aina sanoi, että meidän ei tarvitse kertoa tarinoita siellä, missä ihmiset eivät niistä pidä, mutta heidänkään ei sitten tarvitse ajaa meitä pois, kun emme häiritse heitä.”

”Oletko oikeasti Fatil?” mukaan määrätty poika kysyi.

Eric ja Joseph katsoivat Aminaa uteliaina.

”Kyllä olen. Ja tykkään kertoa tarinoita. Minun omat suosikkini ovat tarinat kenraali Stenvilistä,” Amina vastasi. ”Edellisessä kylässä asianhoitaja sanoi, että olen kylän sääntöjen mukaan liian nuori esiintymään, mutta aion kysyä samaa täällä. Kun seuraavat markkinat tulevat, minä aion esiintyä, jos saan siihen luvan.”

”Sinun kannattaa kysyä myös neiti Slavalta. Hän on tarkka siitä, mitä oppilat tekevät vapaa-ajallaan,” Eric neuvoi.

Amina hymyili kiitokseksi.

Heidän saapuessaan kylän laitamille he näkivät heti, että sepänpaja oli kiinni. Joseph kokeili pajan ovea, mutta se oli lukossa. ”Tämäkin vielä,” hän manasi.

He odottivat joitain minuutteja, mutta seppää ei kuulunut, ja alkoi tihkuttaa.

Amina lupautui jäämään odottamaan seppää, jotta muut voisivat mennä kotiin.

Joseph ja toinen poika lähtivät heti, mutta Eric jäi Aminan seuraksi hetkeksi ja varmisti vielä ennen lähtöään, että tyttö pärjäisi.

Amina ei lopulta odottanut yksin kovin kauaa, ja seppä pahoitteli poissaoloaan.

Amina vakuutti, ettei se haitannut, ja kertoi itsestään ja Jaredista.

Seppä oli ystävällinen, vaikkei tuntenut Jaredia. Hän oli selvästi tottunut alentuvaan kohteluun, mutta se ei haitannut häntä. Seppä oli asunut koko ikänsä Tenerassa ja oppipoika-aikanaan rakastunut sepän tyttäreen. He olivat menneet naimisiin, mutta hänen vaimonsa kuoli muutaman vuoden jälkeen. Surun murtama seppä oli jättänyt pajansa oppipojalleen ja muuttanut veljenpoikansa luo kaupunkiin.

Amina kuunteli mielenkiinnolla ja myötätuntoisesti miehen elämäntarinaa ja kertoi sitten omasta kohtalostaan orpona.

Seppä lupasi hänelle, että hän saa tulla käymään milloin vain.

Amina palasi Streckken taloon iloisena, vaikka kastui matkalla.

Sisäkkö lähetti hänet heti huoneeseensa vaihtamaan kuivat vaatteet päälleen ja sitten syömään.

”Iltaa, kultaseni,” herra Streckke tervehti häntä, kun hän viimein pääsi ruokasaliin asti. ”Millainen päiväsi oli?”

Amina hymyili ja istuutui pöydän ääreen. ”Oli mielenkiintoista käydä kylän ulkopuolella, vaikkei kuoppien täyttäminen ollut kovin kiinnostavaa. Harmi, että alkoi sataa uudestaan. Jäin sepänpajalle odottamaan työkalujen kanssa, koska en ajatellut, että minulla on kiire, ja muut pääsivät lähtemään kotiin,” Amina kuvaili päivän tapahtumia.

Rouva Streckke hymyili hänelle. ”Oletpa sinä kiltti.”

”Todellakin jopa jalo teko sinulta! Minä en kestäisi hetkeäkään ylimääräistä sen kamalan haisevan rakennuksen luona!” Streckken poika päivitteli.

Aminaa häiritsi edelleen nuoren miehen luiseva olemus ja hän vältteli tätä parhaansa mukaan.

Keskustelu kääntyi melkein heti pois Aminasta, sillä hän oli lopultakin vain vieraana talossa, eikä se haitannut häntä.

Palatessaan huoneeseensa Amina päätti kirjoittaa Jaredille ja Krosille. Hän halusi kertoa molemmille tuttavuudestaan sepän kanssa ja muutenkin kuulumisistaan ensimmäisen viikon jälkeen. Edessä oli kaksi vapaapäivää eikä hän oikein tiennyt mitä tehdä. Praie oli yhä omissa oloissaan ja se sopi Aminalle hyvin.

This is not a story entry - Ei tarinaa tällä kertaa

FIN - Olen tässä pari päivää miettinyt NaNoWriMo-projektiani. Se ei ole edistynyt paljoa ja tällä hetkellä mietin haluanko yrittääkään kirjoittaa sitä loppuun edes myöhemmin. Tarina sijoittuu pääasiassa poikkeustilaan, ja viime päivien tapahtumat Brysselissä ovat saaneet  minut pohtimaan onko minulla oikeutta kirjoittaa hyvin erilaisesta ja kuitenkin täysin fiktiivisestä poikkeustilasta, kun maailmassa ja vieläpä länsimaassa on oikeasti tilanne päällä. Tarinani poikkeustila on hyvin erilainen kuin mikään todellinen tilanne nyt tai aiemmin, mutta siinä kuvataan kuitenkin ihmisten arkea rajoitteiden maustamana. 

Minulla on paha tapa jättää joitain kirjoitusprojektejani keskeneräisiksi jopa vuosien ajaksi ja olin alun perin päättänyt kirjoittaa tämän tarinan loppuun, vaikken ehtisi sitä tehdä marraskuun aikana. Tällä hetkellä minulla on kuitenkin olo, että haluaisin haudata sen vähintään useiksi kuukausiksi kansioon X. Ehkä parin päivän päästä olen taas muuttanut mieleni, mutta yritän myös saada ensi viikoksi seuraavan luvun Armarania valmiiksi.

ENG - During the past couple of days I've been seriously thinking about my NaNoWriMo-project. I haven't made much progress with it and at the present I'm not entirely certain I want to finish it at all, even if I continue writing it after November. The setting of my story is mostly in a lockdown, and the events in Brüssels during the past days have made me wonder if I have a right to write about a very different and fully fictional lockdown than is actually taking place in a Western civilized country. The lockdown in my story is nothing like anything that has happened in the world thus far, but it depicts the everyday lives of people with all kinds of restrictions. 

I have a bad habit of leaving unfinished stories behind for years at a time and I had the intention of finishing this one even if it took me longer than November to do so. But at the present I feel like I'd like to forget it in the folder X for several months to come. Maybe in a few days I've changed my mind again, but I try to finish the next chapter of Armaran for next week before that.

Armaran chapter 10

Amina spent as much time as possible out of the house or in her own room during the time she was waiting for the reply from her kin. The reply welcomed her with such complex words that she couldn't quite understand them all. Kros helped her and explained that the relatives were arranging things for her, and she'd be travelling with an acquaintance of theirs, who had some business in the west in a few weeks time. They were also preparing a room for her and making inquiries at the local school if she could attend there.

Amina went to the graveyard on a near daily basis. Snow hadn't melted away and wildlife had taken over her path. The prints of squirrels, deer, rabbits, and an occasional predator went their own separate ways at the edge of the graveyard. Fansi had returned and it told her that Finko would be coming back soon. Amina told the Gahim one story every day. In her mind, she was counting the days until her departure. She cried sometimes. Praie kept to itself – even when Amina was holding Kragu. The days felt long.

Amina packed everything she needed two days before she was leaving. On the last night, Kros gave her some money, so she could indulge herself every now and then, and pay for a safe and trustworthy inn on her way every night. As the acquaintance of her relatives arrived before noon, Amina walked out of the house with the air of determination, and Kros carried her small trunk to the carriage. Amina waved at Emma who was watching in the window, holding Kragu. Then she turned to face Kros.

His eyes were filled with tears and he was biting his lip.

Amina's lower lip began to shake and she hugged him tightly. ”I'll come back soon. Latest to see the summer fair,” she promised.

Kros held her tight for a moment. ”We'll be waiting for you. You're always welcome here,” he said and helped her climb onto the carriage.

The acquaintance was a pleasent sort of man, who had never heard the stories of any Fatil as far as he could remember, though he was familiar with many of the events described in the stories through his studies of history at an academy, and his knowledge of history was based on the official documents instead of folklore. Amina was very interested to hear what had been written in the books of history and taught to people, he was interested in the words used in the stories and sometimes more detailed information on the events even though some things were described in such a poetic manner that it left much room for interpretation.

The village where Amina's kin lived was called Tenera. It was a little smaller than Groshna but more people lived in the surrounding area. The streets and roads were in better condition and every house along the main street had some store in it. Amina was curious about the buildings. In Groshna, there were very few stone buildings, but in Tenera about half of the houses along the main street were made of stone. Part of the village's prosperity was thanks to a road that passed it. The road was in no comparison to the Great Roundabout, but it was the only way through the mountains to west and north-west. The mountains were several days journey away from Tenera but it was one of the biggest towns along the way, as it was still fairly close to the Great Roundabout and its western main road to the centre.

A middle-aged, tall and slender man approached the carriage and greeted Amina's travelling companion. He then turned to her. ”Hello, darling. You are Amina, correct?”

Amina nodded. ”G'day,” she said shyly.

The man smiled at her. ”I'll write to Kros right away today to tell him you arrived safely. Come. We'll go talk to the teacher at the school now,” he said and held out his hand to help Amina climb down from the carriage. He waved his hand leisurely at a boy perhaps three years older than Amina, who immediately came over and picked up Amina's trunk. ”He is our servant-in-training. His father is certain he has what it takes to become a true gentleman.”

Amina was slightly puzzled so she just smiled.

They walked over to the next street to a wooden house that had been painted mud red. There were some inscriptions above the door, but Amina didn't have time to read them as they entered the building straight away. The servant boy placed her trunk carefully on the floor and stood next to the door in waiting. The narrow corridor had one door on both sides and it opened to a larger space at the end. Amina was curious to see what was in there, but she didn't dare to move.

After a moment, the door to their left opened and a stern-looking woman stepped out. ”Good day to you, Mr. Streckke. I apologize for the wait.”

”It is quite alright, Ms. Slava. We waited barely two minutes,” Amina's kinsman replied in a friendly tone and turned to Amina. ”This is Ms. Slava. She is the teacher at this school,” he turned back to the woman. ”This is Amina. She is a relation of ours who most unfortunately lost her parents. She will be staying with us for a while and it is my wish that she could learn under your supervision and guidance.”

Ms. Slava turned her cold, analyzing gaze to Amina. She didn't seem angry, or arrogant, but she wasn't friendly, either.

Amina curtsied.

Ms. Slava pursed her lips tightly and tiny wrinkles appeared on her forehead as she was evaluating the situation. ”Have you ever been taught anything by anyone?” she asked.

Amina nodded. ”I can read and write a little. And a little calculus but I know I have a lot to learn.”

Ms. Slava's face softened a little bit and she seemed perhaps slightly curious. ”Come to my office, please. I would like to test how much you know in order to be able to help you continue where you are at,” she said and directed them through the door.

Amina gave Mr. Streckke a quick look for confirmation, and he nodded. Amina walked into the teacher's office.

”Please, seat yourselves,” Ms. Slava said as she closed the door.

Amina had to get up on her toes to get onto the chair.

Mr. Streckke sat down beside her.

Ms. Slava walked around the table and seated herself opposite them. ”Could you tell me a little bit more about everyone who has taught you so far?”

Amina's palms were getting sweaty. Something about the woman was a bit frightening, and on the other hand, Amina felt a little sorry for her. She couldn't quite explain it, but it wasn't anything Praie was doing or feeling. ”After my family died, I lived with my Daddy's cousin and his wife. At first, there was Emma's aunt and her family, too. Auntie and Emma taught me,” Amina explained.

Ms. Slava was nodding along. ”Right. Homeschooling. Well, that was obvious from the behaviour,” she was muttering and took out a small book from a desk drawer. ”Would you read something from this book, please? And then you can write here-” she took a piece of paper and a thin piece of coal from a pile on the desk ”-your name and a little something else, please.”

Amina was getting very nervous as she took the book from the woman. She managed to read a couple of pages even though her voice was very shaky.

Ms. Slava nodded towards the paper, and Amina scribbled her name. After that she wrote ”Today is a beautiful day”. Ms. Slava watched every move of her hands on the paper, pouting slightly.

”She is a sweet and hard-working girl. I trust my grandnephew's word on it,” Mr. Streckke assured.

Ms. Slava smiled at him. ”Of course. I believe that a couple of weeks of more intense instructions she will receive all the skills she needs for more independent and free studies.” She turned to Amina. ”At my school the studies are divided into periods of four days and one day of commonweal activities. In between, there are two days off. Depending on the weather and the need in town, we help with cleaning up the streets, acquiring and distributing goods to the townspeople, such as perhaps firewood, and sometimes we have even been helping with cattle in the nearby farms. How does that sound to you?”

Amina was perplexed but excited. ”It sounds like fun. I want to learn more.”

Ms. Slava smiled but with her facial muscles only. In her eyes Amina saw a cold and calculating gaze and her body didn't relax one bit. ”Good. I am sure Mr. Streckke will explain to you the issue of your schooling fees.” Ms. Slava stood up. ”Today is the first of the two days off. We shall meet again the day after tomorrow,” she said to Amina and held out her hand.

Amina was confused but held out her hand aswell. She had never shaken hands with anyone before. It was something that only grown-ups do.

Ms. Slava shook hands with Mr. Streckke who was kindly assuring his gratefulness and complimenting her talent as a teacher. He then guided Amina out of the room.

The servant boy picked up Amina's trunk as he saw them leave the office.

The way to the Streckke family house wasn't very long even though they lived outside the village. The road was in good condition and the other houses along it looked well-kept aswell.

At the gate, they were greeted by a man who was significantly younger than Mr. Streckke. He was introduced as a man servant. In addition, they also had a housemaid whom Amina would meet later. As they entered the house, Mr. Streckke instructed the servant boy to show Amina to her room.

Amina followed the boy upstairs. The room reserved in her use wasn't very big but it had all she needed in it. Amina was especially happy about the small table that she could use to write her letters.

The servant boy placed the trunk gently on the floor and asked her if she needed anything.

Amina was perplexed. No one had ever tended to her like this before. She said no, but enquired the location of the bathroom.

The servant boy told her and encouraged her to be ready for afternoon tea in a couple of hours.

Amina explored the room. Besides the small bed, chair and table, there were no other furniture, but two closets had been built into the wall. The other closet had shelves and the other had little hooks to hang clothes. Amina placed her trunk at the bottom of the other closet and started to pile her clothes on the shelves. She placed her stationary on one corner of the table and hid her letters from Jared under the matress. She was beginning to feel that the revalation of having a friend in such a menial industry as metal working might not be quite so welcome in this house. Maybe she was better suited for a servant than the boy who had good manners and was very polite.

***

The housemaid came to her room to invite her to tea and introduced herself.

Amina's first impression of the woman was very positive and she dared to smile in her company.

Downstairs in the dining room Amina met some other members of the family – Mr. Streckke seemed high-spirited and his wife was almost as slender as he, though she was shorter. A young man who was introduced as their son was also very tall but almost skeletal in his appearence. Amina was shocked to see him and asked Praie what was wrong with him. Praie didn't reply.

Mr. Streckke noticed her stare and asked about it.

Amina bit her lip. ”I have never seen anyone so thin,” she answered.

”That is understanable. You are used to seeing people who work hard with their bodies and have the kind of body that has been shaped by that work. My son has worked his mind hard, but you can't see that on the outside. He is nonetheless a healthy and strong young man,” Mr. Streckke explained.

Amina nodded. To her, he didn't look healthy, but he was alive and didn't seem sick or weak.

Mrs. Streckke seemed to be a nervous and suffering type of a person, though she was very kind to Amina. She promised to show Amina the neighbourhood the next day as she didn't have to go to school.

Amina was grateful and smiled. This family seemed very different from Kros and Emma, but they were all kind to her and that gave her peace of mind. Before she fell asleep that night, Amina tried to call Praie out. The spirit refused to communicate with her, so she let it be.

***

The first day in Tenera went by fast and Amina had very few memories of it later on. Mrs. Streckke kept her promise and showed her around the neighbourhood and most of the village. Amina met some children who were studying under the supervision of Ms. Slava, but she didn't have enough time to get to know anyone. Amina tried to learn all the stores in one day and a few stuck to her mind immediately – especially the smithy even though she didn't have enough time to visit it. It was located at the edge of the village so the smoke wouldn't bother the villagers so much. Amina made a mental note to visit the smithy the first chance she had. Even though Jared hadn't yet finished his apprenticeship and might never have been to Tenera before, Amina wanted to meet the local blacksmith or apprentice. The warmth of the smithy soothed her mind.

Amina wrote a short letter to Kros herself and she intended to send it the next day. She assured him she was content with the Streckke family and everything they had done for her. She was anxiously waiting for the next day, the first day of school, and was hopeful she'd make friends soon. She also revealed her intention to visit the smithy, though she hadn't yet said anything of it to anyone else.

In the evening before she fell asleep, Amina tried to talk to Praie again. She was genuinely worried about Mr. Streckke's son but didn't know what was wrong with him. Praie hadn't paid him any attention. In fact, it hadn't paid attention to anything and was uninterested in everything. All it wanted was to mope and pout in hiding.

Amina left Praie to itself and thought about her situation. Mr. Streckke had explained to her how her schooling fees should be paid. He had never mentioned who would pay them and Amina was a little disappointed when she realized she'd have to pay them herself, even though Ms. Slava had promised her a significant discount due to her situation in life. Amina wanted to learn more. She was a little wistful in her thoughts as she was certain that Kros would never have let her pay for her education, and he'd gone to extreme lengths to pay it all for her – there would have been no talk of using the money from the story leather. Amina fought back tears. Longing home was crushing her chest for the first time so hard. Praie didn't react at all.

Amina thought how different it was now that she didn't have to watch for Praie every minute. She hadn't been able to imagine anything like this. She felt a little bit lonely in this new life where she knew no one and hadn't met any Gahim yet. Her sole and eternal companion wasn't available. She was almost as lonely as she had thought she was after surviving from the ruins.

Amina decided to make friends with at least one person on the very next day at school. She felt so very insignificant in the house of a family so much wealthier than herself but she was still Amina. It would be stupid if the family's riches were to determine her success in making friends. Besides, Mrs. Streckke had introduced her to some children so all she had to do was to go talk to them. It couldn't be that hard.

Amina fell asleep on her own. Praie was still moping.

Armaran 10. luku

FIN - Tämän kerran päivitys onnistuu ajallaan epävirallisesta NaNoWriMo-osallistumisestani huolimatta. Toivon mukaan ehdin kääntää luvun englanniksi parissa viikossa muun kirjoituksen ohella. En osallistu NaNoWriMoon virallisesti, koska on erittäin todennäköistä, etten saa 50 000 sanaa (suomeksi) aikaiseksi kuukauden aikana. Osittain on kyse siitä, ettei kirjottamani tarina välttämättä tule olemaan niin pitkä, että se koskaan yltäisi 50k sanaan.

ENG - Updating the blog on time! Even with my unofficial participation in NaNoWriMo. I hope I can spare enough time from that to translate chapter 10 in English within the next two weeks. I'm not taking part in NaNoWriMo officially because it is very likely I won't get 50 000 words (in Finnish) written in a month. Or rather, I don't think the story I'm writing will reach 50k words.

Armaran 10. luku

Amina vietti mahdollisimman paljon aikaa poissa talosta tai omassa huoneessaan, kun hän odotti vastausta kirjeeseen. Vastaus oli myönteinen ja sanamuodoiltaan sellainen, ettei Amina ymmärtänyt kaikkea. Kros selvensi hänelle, että sukulaiset ottaisivat hänet vastaan ja heidän tuttavansa, jolla oli asioita lännempänä, tulisi hakemaan hänet muutaman viikon kuluttua. Sukulaiset myös järjestäisivät hänelle oman huoneen ja tiedustelisivat etukäteen mahdollisuutta opiskella kylän koulussa.

Amina kävi lähes päivittäin hautausmaalla. Lumi ei ollut sulanut pois ja villieläimet olivat ottaneet hänen tallaamansa polut käyttöönsä. Oravien, peurojen, jänisten ja parin petoeläimenkin jäljet erkanivat omille teilleen hautausmaan laidalla. Fansi oli palannut ja se kertoi, että Finkokin tulisi pian takaisin. Amina kertoi hengille yhden tarinan joka päivä. Hän laski mielessään päiviä lähtöönsä. Hän itki välillä. Praie oli edelleen omissa oloissaan – jopa silloin, kun Amina piteli Kragua. Päivät tuntuivat pitkiltä.

Amina pakkasi kaiken tarvitsemansa valmiiksi kaksi päivää ennen lähtöä. Viimeisenä iltana Kros antoi hänelle jonkin verran rahaa, jotta hän voisi hemmotella itseään välillä ja jotta hän voisi matkalla maksaa yöpymisensä turvallisissa ja luotettavissa majataloissa. Kun sukulaisten tuttavamies saapui aamupäivällä, Amina käveli määrätietoisesti ulos, ja Kros kantoi hänen pienen matka-arkkunsa vaunuihin. Amina vilkutti Emmalle, joka katseli ikkunasta Kragu sylissään. Sitten hän kääntyi Krosiin päin.

Miehen silmät olivat kyynelistä märät ja hän puri huultaan.

Aminan alahuuli alkoi väristä ja hän halasi miestä lujaa. ”Tulen pian takaisin. Ihan viimeistään kesäjuhlille,” hän lupasi.

Kros rutisti häntä. ”Me odotamme sinua. Olet aina tervetullut,” hän sanoi ja auttoi Aminan vaunujen kyytiin.

Sukulaisten tuttava oli miellyttävä mies, joka ei ollut koskaan ainakaan oman muistinsa mukaan kuullut Fatilien tarinoita, vaikka monet niiden kertomat historialliset tapahtumat olivat hänelle tuttuja. Heidän ajomatkansa koostui enemmän keskustelusta ja vertailusta kuin itse tarinoista, sillä mies oli opiskellut myös historiaa akatemiassa ja hänen tietonsa historiasta perustuivat virallisiin dokumentteihin tarinoiden sijaan. Amina kuunteli mielenkiinnolla mitä historiasta oli kirjoitettu ja mitä siitä opetettiin, ja miestä kiinnostivat tarinoiden sanamuodot ja osin yksityiskohtaisemmat tiedot joistain tapahtumista, vaikka monissa tarinoissa oli käytetty taiteellista vapautta asioiden kuvaamisessa.

Kylä, jossa Aminan sukulaiset asuivat, oli nimeltään Tenera. Se oli hieman Groshnaa pienempi keskukseltaan, mutta sen ympäristössä asui muuten enemmän ihmisiä. Kadut olivat paremmin hoidettuja kuin Groshnassa ja kaikissa pääkadun varrella olevissa taloissa oli erilaisia liikkeitä.

Amina katseli rakennuksia kiinnostuneena. Groshnassa oli vain pari kivirakennusta, mutta Tenerassa niitä oli melkein puolet keskustan taloista. Kylän vaurautta selitti osaltaan sen ohi kulkeva tie, joka ei ollut Suuren kiertotien veroinen tai kokoinen, mutta se oli ainoa reitti turvallisesti vuoriston läpi länteen ja luoteeseen. Vuoristoon oli Tenerasta vielä monen päivän matka, mutta se oli suurimpia kyliä tien varrella, koska se sijaitsi kuitenkin melko lähellä Suurta kiertotietä ja sen lännestä keskustaan johtavaa pääväylää.

Keski-ikäinen, pitkä ja hoikka mies lähestyi vaunuja ja tervehti Aminan matkaseuralaista. Sitten hän kääntyi Aminan puoleen. ”Hei, kultaseni. Sinä olet Amina, eikö niin?”

Amina nyökkäsi. ”Päivää,” hän sanoi hieman ujosti.

Mies hymyili hänelle. ”Kirjoitan heti tänään Krosille, että saavuit turvallisesti. Tule. Menemme heti hoitamaan asiasi koululle,” hän sanoi ja ojensi kättään, jotta Aminan oli helpompi kavuta alas vaunuista. Hän viittasi Aminaa muutaman vuoden vanhemmalle pojalle, joka nosti Aminan matka-arkun vaunuista. ”Hän on harjoittelemassa palveluspojaksemme. Hänen isänsä on varma, että hänessä on ainesta herrasmieheksi.”

Amina oli hieman ymmällään, joten hän vain hymyili.

He kävelivät seuraavalle kadulle savenpunaiseksi maalatun puisen rakennuksen luo. Oven yläpuolelle oli kaiverrettu tekstiä, mutta Amina ei ehtinyt lukemaan sitä ennen kuin he astuivat sisään. Palveluspoika laski arkun lattialle ja jäi odottamaan ulko-oven viereen. Kapeasta käytävästä johti ovi sekä oikealle että vasemmalle ja käytävän päädystä aukesi isompi tila. Amina oli utelias ja halusi mennä katsomaan, muttei uskaltanut liikkua.

Hetken päästä vasemmanpuoleisesta ovesta astui käytävään tuimannäköinen nainen. ”Hyvää päivää, herra Streckke. Pahoittelen, että jouduitte odottamaan.”

”Ei hätää, neiti Slava. Odotimme tuskin kahta minuuttia,” sukulaismies sanoi ystävällisellä äänellä ja kääntyi Aminan puoleen. ”Tämä on neiti Slava. Hän toimii koulun opettajana,” hän kääntyi uudestaan naisen puoleen. ”Tämä on Amina. Hän on sukulaistyttö, joka valitettavasti menetti vanhempansa. Hän asuu luonamme jonkin aikaa ja toivomukseni olisi, että hän voisi opiskella teidän opastuksellanne.”

Neiti Slava kääntyi katsomaan Aminaa kylmän arvioivilla silmillä. Hänen ilmeensä ei ollut varsinaisesti vihainen tai ylimielinen, muttei ystävällinenkään.

Amina niiasi.

Neiti Slava puristi huulensa yhteen ja hänen otsansa rypistyi hänen pohtiessaan tilannetta. ”Oletko koskaan ollut kenenkään opissa ennen?” hän kysyi.

Amina nyökkäsi. ”Osaan lukea ja kirjoittaa vähän. Ja vähän laskutaitoa, vaikka minulla on vielä paljon opittavaa.”

Naisen ilme pehmeni hieman ja hän vaikutti jopa hieman uteliaalta. ”Tulkaa toimistooni. Haluan testata kuinka paljon osaat, jotta tiedän mistä voisit aloittaa oppisi,” hän sanoi ja viittasi kädellään oven suuntaan.

Amina vilkaisi herra Streckkeä kysyvästi ja tämä nyökkäsi. Amina käveli opettajattaren toimistoon.

”Istukaa, olkaa hyvät,” neiti Slava kehotti sulkiessaan oven.

Amina joutui kurottumaan, jotta pääsi istumaan tuolille.

Herra Streckke istui hänen viereensä.

Neiti Slava kiersi pöydän toiselle puolelle ja istuutui. ”Voisitko kertoa vielä hieman tarkemmin kuka sinua on opettanut?”

Aminan kämmenet hikosivat. Jokin naisessa oli hieman pelottavaa ja toisaalta jotenkin säälittävää. Hän ei osannut selittää, mistä tunne johtui. Ainakaan Praie ei tehnyt mitään. ”Sen jälkeen, kun perheeni kuoli, asuin isän serkun ja hänen vaimonsa luona. Ensin siellä asui myös Emman täti ja perhe. Täti ja Emma opettivat minua,” Amina vastasi.

Neiti Slava nyökkäili. ”Aivan. Kotiopetusta. Sen kyllä huomaa käytöksestäkin,” hän mutisi ja kaivoi yhdestä laatikosta pienen kirjan. ”Lukisitko minulle ääneen pätkän? Ja sitten voisit kirjoittaa tähän-” hän otti pöydältä palan paperia ja kapean hiilen ”-nimesi ja missä olet asunut tai jotain muuta.”

Aminaa alkoi jännittää, kun hän otti kirjan naiselta. Hän onnistui kuitenkin lukemaan pari sivua, vaikka hänen äänensä värisi voimakkaasti.

Neiti Slava nyökkäsi paperia kohti, ja Amina raapusti hiilellä oman nimensä. Sen jälkeen hän kirjoitti ”Tänään on kaunis päivä.” Neiti Slava tarkkaili hänen käsiensä jokaista liikettä paperilla suu mutrussa.

”Hän on kiltti ja ahkera tyttö. Luotan sukulaispoikani sanaan siitä,” herra Streckke vakuutti.

Neiti Slava hymyili miehelle. ”Toki. Uskoisin, että parin viikon tehokkaalla opastuksella hän saa tarvittavat taidot voidakseen opiskella vapaammin.” Hän kääntyi taas Aminan puoleen. ”Koulussani on aina neljän päivän opintojakso ja yksi päivä yhteishyödyllistä toimintaa. Niiden välissä on aina kaksi päivää vapaata. Sään ja avuntarpeen mukaan autamme muun muassa katujen siistimisessä, polttopuiden tai muiden hyödykkeiden jakelussa kyläläisille tai joskus jopa karjanhoidossa kylää ympäröivillä maatiloilla. Miltä se kuulostaa?”

Amina oli hämmentynyt, mutta innoissaan. ”Se kuulostaa kivalta. Haluan oppia lisää.”

Neiti Slava hymyili, mutta vain kasvoillaan. Silmissä säilyi kylmän laskelmoiva ilme eikä hänen kehonkielensä rentoutunut yhtään. ”Hyvä. Herra Streckke varmasti selittää sinulle miten koulumaksusi määräytyy.” Neiti Slava nousi seisomaan. ”Tänään on ensimmäinen kahdesta vapaapäivästä, joten tapaamme ylihuomenna,” hän sanoi Aminalle ja ojensi kätensä.

Amina ojensi kätensä naiselle kummissaan. Hän ei ollut koskaan ennen kätellyt ketään. Se oli aikuisten tapa.

Neiti Slava kätteli myös herra Streckken kanssa, joka vakuutti ystävällisesti kiitollisuuttaan ja kehui naisen ammattitaitoa. Sitten hän ohjasi Aminan ulos.

Palveluspoika nosti matka-arkun ilmaan, kun he poistuivat opettajattaren toimistosta.

Matka Streckken talolle ei ollut kovin pitkä, vaikka talo sijaitsi hieman kylän ulkopuolella. Tie oli hyväkuntoinen ja naapuritalotkin olivat hyvinhoidettuja.

Portilla heitä tervehti herra Streckkeä selvästi nuorempi mies, jonka tämä esitteli miespalvelijaksi. Sen lisäksi heillä oli myös sisäkkö, jonka Amina saisi tavata myöhemmin. Sisällä talossa herra Streckke ohjeisti palveluspoikaa ohjaamaan Aminan tälle varattuun huoneeseen.

Amina seurasi poikaa yläkertaan. Hänen huoneensa ei ollut kovin suuri, mutta siellä oli kaikki tarpeellinen. Amina ilahtui pienestä pöydästä, jonka ääressä hän voisi kirjoittaa kirjeitä.

Palveluspoika asetti hänen matka-arkkunsa lattialle ja kysyi tarvitsiko hän mitään.

Amina oli hämillään. Kukaan ei ollut ennen palvellut häntä. Hän vastasi kieltävästi, mutta tiedusteli pesuhuoneen sijaintia.

Poika neuvoi hänelle sen sijainnin ja kehotti häntä olemaan valmiina iltapäiväteelle parin tunnin kuluttua.

Amina tutki huonetta. Pienen sängyn, pöydän ja tuolin lisäksi ei ollut huonekaluja, mutta seinän sisään oli rakennettu kaksi kaappia. Toisessa oli hyllyjä ja toiseen hän saattoi ripustaa vaatteitaan. Hän asetteli arkun kaapin pohjalle ja nosti osan vaatteistaan hyllyille. Hän asetteli kirjoitustarvikkeitaan pöydän nurkalle ja piilotti aikaisemmat kirjeensä Jaredilta patjan alle. Hänestä alkoi tuntua, ettei olisi järkevää paljastaa niin rahvasta ystävyyttä kuin hänen tuttavuutensa sepän kanssa. Ehkä hän olisi ollut sopivampi palvelijaksi kuin poika, joka oli hyvätapainen ja kohtelias.

***

Sisäkkö tuli hakemaan Aminaa teelle ja esittäytyi ystävällisesti.

Aminan ensivaikutelma naisesta oli erittäin positiivinen ja hän uskalsi hymyillä tämän seurassa.

Alhaalla ruokasalissa Amina tapasi myös muita perheenjäseniä – herra Streckke oli ylään oloinen mies ja hänen vaimonsa oli lähes yhtä solakka, mutta huomattavasti lyhyempi. Nuori mies, joka esiteltiin heidän poikanaan, oli myös pitkä, mutta melkein luurankomaisen laiha. Amina oli järkyttynyt miehen nähdessään ja kysyi Praielta, mikä miestä vaivasi. Praie ei vastannut.

Herra Streckke huomasi hänen tuijotuksensa ja kysyi siitä.

Amina puri huultaan. ”En ole ennen nähnyt ketään noin laihaa,” hän vastasi.

”Ymmärrettävää. Olet tottunut näkemään raskasta työtä tekeviä ihmisiä, joiden ruumiinrakenne on sen mukainen. Poikani on kehittänyt erityisesti aivojaan, joiden lihasvoima ei näy päälle päin. Hän on kuitenkin terve ja vahva nuorimies,” herra Streckke selitti.

Amina nyökkäsi. Hänestä mies ei näyttänyt terveeltä, mutta tämä oli hengissä eikä vaikuttanut suoraan huonovointiselta tai heikolta.

Rouva Streckke vaikutti levottomalta ja kärsivältä olennolta, vaikka hän olikin Aminalle ystävällinen. Hän lupasi tutustuttaa Aminaa naapurustoon heti seuraavana päivänä, koska ei ollut koulupäivä.

Amina hymyili kiitollisena. Perhe vaikutti hyvin erilaiselta kuin Kros ja Emma, mutta he olivat kuitenkin Aminalle ystävällisiä, mikä rauhoitti tytön mieltä. Illalla ennen nukahtamistaan Amina yritti houkutella Praiea esiin. Henki ei suostunut kommunikoimaan hänen kanssaan, joten hän antoi sen olla.

***

Ensimmäinen päivä Tenerassa kului nopeasti eikä Amina myöhemmin muistanut siitä paljoa. Rouva Streckke piti lupauksensa ja esitteli hänelle naapurustoa ja suuren osan kylästä. Hän tapasi joitain lapsia, jotka olivat myös neiti Slavan oppilaita, muttei ehtinyt tutustumaan kehenkään. Amina ehti painaa mieleensä joitakin liikkeitä kylän keskustassa – erityisesti hänen mieleensä jäi sepänpaja, vaikkei hän ehtinyt käydä siellä. Se sijaitsi kylän laidalla, jotta sen savu ei häiritsisi kyläläisiä niin paljoa, mutta Amina päätti käydä siellä heti, kun siihen tulisi mahdollisuus. Vaikkei Jared ollut vielä palannut oppimatkaltaan eikä tämä välttämättä koskaan käynyt Tenerassa, Amina halusi tutustua paikalliseen seppään tai kisälliin. Sepänpajan lämpö rauhoitti hänen mieltään.

Amina kirjoitti itsekin Krosille lyhyen kirjeen, jonka hän aikoi postittaa seuraavana päivänä. Hän vakuutti olevansa tyytyväinen Streckken perheeseen ja kaikkeen, mitä he olivat hänen hyväkseen järjestäneet. Hän kertoi myös odottavansa innolla koulun alkamista ja toivoi saavansa nopeasti kavereita. Krosille hän uskalsi myös kertoa, että aikoi tutustua paikalliseen sepänpajaan.

Illalla ennen nukahtamistaan Amina yritti taas keskustella Praien kanssa. Hän oli aidosti huolissaan herra Streckken pojan terveydestä, muttei tiennyt mikä tätä vaivasi. Praie ei ollut kiinnittänyt tähän mitään huomiota. Se ei ollut huomioinut oikeastaan mitään eikä sitä sen enempää kiinnostanutkaan mikään. Se halusi vain murjottaa piilossa.

Amina jätti Praien omaan rauhaansa ja mietti tilannettaan. Herra Streckke oli selittänyt hänelle miten hänen koulunsa tulisi maksaa. Hän ei ollut missään vaiheessa sanonut mitään siitä, kuka maksut suorittaisi, joten Amina totesi pettyneenä, että hänen täytyisi maksaa ne itse, vaikka neiti Slava oli luvannut antaa alennusta hänen perhetilanteensa takia. Amina halusi kuitenkin oppia lisää. Hän mietti hieman kaihoisasti, miten Kros ei olisi koskaan antanut hänen maksaa omasta koulunkäynnistään, vaan olisi maksanut sen hänen puolestaan omista rahoistaan – edes tarinanahan rahoihin ei olisi saanut koskea. Amina taisteli hetken kyyneliä vastaan. Ikävä kouristi hänen rintaansa ensimmäistä kertaa voimakkaasti. Praie ei reagoinut mitenkään.

Amina mietti hetken, miten erilaista oli, kun hänen ei tarvinnut vahtia Praiea koko ajan. Hän ei ollut osannut kuvitella, että tilanne voisi koskaan olla tällainen. Hän tunsi olonsa jopa hieman yksinäiseksi uudessa kylässä, koska hän ei tuntenut ketään ihmistä eikä ollut vielä tavannut yhtään henkeä. Hänen ainoa ja ikuinen seuralaisensa ei ollut saatavilla. Hän oli melkein yhtä yksin kuin oli luullut olevansa pelastuttuaan raunioista.

Amina päätti, että hankkisi heti seuraavana päivänä ainakin yhden kaverin koulusta. Hän tunsi olonsa mitättömäksi vauraamman perheen talossa, mutta hän oli edelleen oma itsensä. Olisi tyhmää, jos perheen varakkuudella olisi väliä ystävystyessä. Sitä paitsi rouva Streckke oli esitellyt hänet joillekin lapsille, joten hänen täytyisi vain mennä puhumaan heille. Eihän se voisi olla kovin vaikeaa.

Amina nukahti omia aikojaan. Praie rypi yhä pettymyksessään.

Armaran chapter 9

FIN - Juu, tiedetään, myöhässä. Pahoitteluni siitä. Syitä on monia, pari niistä ihan päteviä. Maanantaina otettu influenssarokote jumitti ja kipeytti olkapään moneksi päiväksi. Tänään on ensimmäinen päivä, kun se ei enää vaivaa. 

Muuten tässä harkitsen mahdollisesti osallistuvani ensi kuussa NaNoWriMoon. Tarina on tavallaan jo valmiina ja vähän hahmoteltunakin, mutta täytyy vielä miettiä, kannattaako se. Saattaisi käydä ainakin niin, että tämä blogi jäisi sitten päivittämättä.

PS. Anteeksi mahdolliset typot. Oikoluku meni enemmän väsyneeksi silmäilyksi.

ENG - Yes, I'm very aware I'm late. Sorry about that, again. There are several reasons, the most important one being the influenza vaccination I got on Monday. It made my shoulder ache for the past days and today is actually the first day it doesn't feel too bad anymore.

On other news, I'm considering taking part in NaNoWriMo come November. I sort of have a story in waiting and I've done some planning, but I still have to think about it. Is it worth it? It would probably mean, that I won't be publishing anything new in this blog the whole month.

PS. My apologies for any and all typoes. I'm not quite as awake as I should be to be able to spot them all.

Armaran chapter 9

Amina woke up energetic and restless. Praie was anxious and it had done all in its power to give her a good rest. It wanted to go see Emma and the baby right away. Amina slouched to the kitchen and lit a fire in the hearth taking her time. Praie was rushing her and coaxing her to skip breakfast. Amina ignored the spirit the best she could. She put the kettle on the fire and reached up to the top cupboard for some bread that had been baked the day before. It was getting a little dry and hard on the cut edge. She thought for a minute and cut several slices of bread and spread jam on all of them. She took out a tray and brew some tea. Eventually, there were five pieces of jam covered bread, three cups, a small pot of honey, and the tea pot on the tray. It was almost too heavy for Amina to carry, but she managed to jolt towards Kros and Emma's bedroom door. She had to stop to think how she would manage to open the door with the heavy tray in her hands, but couldn't think of anything.

The door opened just as she was about to put the tray down on the floor for a minute. Messy-haired Kros was standing in the doorway and he nearly tripped over her. ”Morning,” he said, a little surprised. It was obvious he hadn't had much sleep.

Amina gave him a brisk smile. ”I was just thinking you must be hungry,” she said and managed to lift the tray a little more.

Kros returned her smile and took the tray from her and put it down on the bedroom table. The room was still messy and smelled of blood.

Amina stepped in carefully and looked at Emma, who was lying on the bed, facing the opposite wall.

”We haven't thought of a name yet,” Kros told her as he was pouring tea for everyone. ”He's so very small but the most beautiful little boy I have ever seen.”

Amina dared a few steps closer to Emma. The woman was still quiet and facing the wall.

”She won't let go of him even for a second,” Kros smirked and went around the bed. He placed a mug on a chair next to the bed and reached his arms towards Emma. She moved a little just as Kros drew the baby from her arms.

Emma mumbled something but Amina couldn't make out the words.

”Amina brought us some breakfast. I'll hold the boy so you can eat,” Kros said in a soft and loving voice as he was holding the baby very gently.

Emma lifted herself in a sitting-position on the edge of the bed and reached for the mug. ”Amina?” she said in a coarse voice.

”I'm here. I made some sandwiches,” Amina replied quickly. It took almost all of her concentration to keep Praie at bay.

”Thank you... Could you bring me a sandwich? I don't know if I'm strong enough to stand yet,” Emma asked.

Amina rushed to the tray and picked the sandwich with the most jam on it. She walked around the bed and held it out. It was only then that she saw Emma's face for the first time. She had never seen anyone so tired and worn out, it was nothing in comparison to how Emma and Kros had both been exhausted some months before. Amina bit her lip and swallowed.

Emma was moving slowly as she took the sandwich from Amina with a grateful but tired smile. ”You're always so kind to me.”

Amina felt she might start to cry at any moment if she had to look at the traces of suffering on Emma's face any longer.

Kros woke her from her shock. ”Could you go and wash your hands? And be sure to wash them good. Then you can hold your little cousin.”

Amina looked into Kros's eyes with disbelief. The elation of Praie was bubbling inside her and it wanted to raise her hand towards the baby right away, but Amina told it not to. Kros had just told her to wash her hands. She ran to the bathroom and poured a lot of water in a basin. She rubbed soap on her hands for a full minute and rinsed them three times. Amina returned to the bedroom in a calm state of mind. Praie was under her control, as Kros instructed her how to hold the newborn and carefully placed the small life on her arms. Praie was smart enough not to try anything. The baby was small, soft, and warm. Amina stared at his face for a long time: tiny round nose, soft cheeks, his eyes tightly shut, and mouth slightly pouting. He was calm on her arms. Amina gave Praie permission to listen to his heart, which was now beating harder than before. It was on its own now. Amina touched his cheek with her fingertips. Praie shivered with excitement as it felt her touch through the baby. Amina smiled. Maybe she would manage with Praie and it would learn to behave, as it would have to be very careful with something as fragile and innocent as a newborn. If it behaved well, Amina would let it touch the baby. Praie didn't reply.

Amina looked up at Emma and Kros. Emma had placed her head on the pillow and Kros was tending to his wife the best he could, asking if she needed more tea or food, if she needed anything else, or if there was something else he could to to make her feel better.

”I can get some warm water and a towel. Maybe washing your face makes you feel a little better,” Amina suggested to Emma.

Emma smiled and nodded.

Amina handed the baby over to Kros, who took him gently. Amina scurried back to the bathroom and poured some clean water in a basin. Then she took the basin to the kitchen and poured some hot water into the colder water. She carried the basin to the bedroom and ran out again to get a clean towel. As she returned to the bedroom again, she heard a knock on the door. ”Someone's at the door,” she said to Kros as she handed the towel to Emma.

Kros seemed reluctant to let go of the baby, as Emma was tending to herself, so Amina went to open the door. One of the ladies from the neighbourhood smiled warmly at her and enquired after Emma. Amina asked her to come in. ”Could you wait a moment? I'm gonna get more water so you can wash your hands,” Amina blurted out and ran off without waiting for an answer. She dashed to the bathroom and grabbed two buckets and then onwards to the backyard where their well was. She pumped the buckets full as fast as she could. She couldn't run back into the house because of the weight of the water, but she walked as fast as she could and cursed in her mind all the spilt water.

The neighbour had gone to the bedroom door and was talking with Kros and Emma, but she came straight to Amina as she returned and thanked her kindly for going through the trouble of getting her more water. She washed her hands and went straight to Emma. Kros left the ladies to themselves and closed the door after him. He smiled at Amina.

”You didn't sleep too much, did you?” Amina asked.

Kros laughed. ”I couldn't. They are both so beautiful,” he replied and brushed his fingers through his hair.

In the spur of the moment, Amina hugged Kros. She was so happy to see him happy even though he was tired.

Kros returned her hug with a short but gentle bearhold.

Praie was confused. Why wasn't Amina as worried about Kros being very tired now as she had been the previous autumn? Why was it good to stay awake all night? Amina wondered whether the spirit was stupid or ignorant. Did it not understand that even when you are tired, you can be so very happy, that you can't sleep?

”I have to go buy some meat,” Kros said a little wistfully.

Amina giggled. ”I'm sure Emma's fine with it. And I'm here, in case she needs anything,” she promised.

Kros left the house reluctantly, and Amina snuck to the bedroom door to listen. She couldn't make out the words. Praie tried to sneak her hand towards the door handle. Amina fired up immediately because she didn't like the selfishness of Praie's action and she ran to her room. Amina was also mad at herself for believing even a moment that the spirit had learned to behave.

***

In the afternoon, Kros came to find Amina, as she had not left her room since before noon. He was a little bit worried about her well-being as she hadn't eaten anything after breakfast.

Amina was very hungry but she was determined to punish Praie. At first, Praie had tried to make her feel even hungrier in hope of making her leave the room, but eventually it gave up and eased her feeling instead. Amina was feeling weak but she was happy about her victory over the spirit, because she had managed to stay stationary on her floor sitting on her legs for most of the time. To Kros, she explained she didn't want to disturb the baby, as it had been all quiet and she had thought he was asleep.

Kros laughed out loud. ”Is your door really that thick? The little one has cried twice in the last hour alone. You really didn't hear that?”

Amina smiled vaguely. She got up slowly and walked to the kitchen with rigid feet.

Emma was sitting at the table and chopping vedgetables. She smiled at Amina.

Amina was relieved because the woman didn't look quite as exhausted as she had done in the morning. ”Can I help with something?” she asked.

Emma asked her to stir the stew on the hearth and drop the chopped vedgetables in it as soon as she had finished cutting them.

Amina made a side-ways glance into the corner behind Emma. The cradle had been placed there. Praie tried to pull her towards the corner, but she resisted. Stupid Gahim. Because of it, something bad could happen to the baby.

They had a calm dinner even though Emma had to take the baby to the bedroom to calm down. Their everyday life was as usual, with the only exception of having one more member to the family.

In the evening, Amina asked Emma shyly how she was feeling. Emma was still tired but denied that she might be too exhausted to take care of the chores.

Amina argued about it and promised to do all the housework until Emma looked energetic again.

Even though Kros didn't want Amina to exert herself, he agreed that Emma needed rest and time to take care of the baby, and Amina was of great help.

Eventually, Emma yielded but she made Emma swear to tell her whenever she was tired and wouldn't do any more.

Everyone went to bed satisfied with the day and were waiting with much anticipation all the coming days.

***

Over the first few weeks, Amina avoided touching the baby as much as she could, even though she had to hold him every now and then when Emma and Kros had other things to do. Amina threathened Praie with everything she could think of – ripping out her own eyes, cutting her arms – unless it stopped fumbling after the baby. The spirit didn't show its feelings, but for most of the time Amina spent near the baby, it behaved rather well.

When he was 20 days old, the baby was given a name: Kragu. A man with the same name had lived several centuries before and had been a warlord and Kahtal, much like General Stenvil. Almost all of the residents of Groshna came to give their well-wishes to the new villager, and Amina spent most of the day indoors. She wanted to go to her room and read the answer she had received from Jared, but Emma and Kros needed her help in the main room with the guests. The hero of the day himself spent most of the day asleep and unaware of the commotion, save a few times he cried his hunger or other distress. Praie was too curious about all the other people to acknowledge the baby much, which was one of the few things that helped Amina calm down a little.

Most of the people left at sundown. Amina promised to escort an elderly couple to their house which was a little way outside of the village. She covered herself with a thick scarf and lit a lantern. The elderly couple were slow walkers and supported each other as they went, and Amina didn't mind the leisurely pace. She finally had some time to think about everything that had happened that day and the fresh air was wonderful to breathe.

Amina walked back a little faster even though she wasn't in a hurry.

Night had fallen and the only light came from her lantern. Or did it? Amina tensed and stopped for a moment. Her breathing steamed in front of her and blurred the view as she lifted the lantern a little higher to see further ahead. Something was twinkling in the air. Amina sighed in relief. It was snowing. Nothing dangerous after all. She picked up her pace again and as she was approaching the town, wondered whether she should visit the graveyard or not. It was a little longer a way to walk, but not significantly. She hadn't gone there once since the baby was born. Amina stopped again. This time the flash she saw wasn't the twinkling of the snowflakes in the light.

Fiery but pale eyes opened again and approached her. Keok. It wasn't the same Keok she had met near her old home. It was still Keok. It might be as unpredictable.

Amina swallowed nervously and hardly noticed she was backing away slowly.

Keok stopped, puzzled, and hissed something softly. It didn't know or couldn't remember how to speak.

Amina took a few deep breaths. ”Gahim arimma hajahka. I am on my way back to the village.”

Keok tilted its head. It didn't answer. It had probably just wandered to the area.

Amina tried to think hard about what to do. ”You can walk with me some of the way, but you have no business in town,” she said in a strict voice and passed the spirit quickly. She felt the spirit following her. Amina decided to go to the graveyard. If any Gahim were there, she'd ask them to drive Keok away.

The snow was getting thicker and it was starting to get difficult to see in the dark. The graveyard was deserted and quiet, as if wrapped in cloth. The falling snow sucked in all sound, and Amina was getting nervous because no one would hear her scream, if Keok attacked her. She stopped in front of her family's graves and hummed. The snow was piling on top of the crosses and Amina thought about the previous winter. A few tears fell on her cheeks.

Keok let out a strangled and panicky sound and held its hand out to her face.

Amina lifted her hand in rejection. ”I'm okay. I'm just thinking about my dead family.”

Keok calmed down and stared at the crosses with her.

”There are sometimes many Gahim here. Though, I haven't seen any in a few weeks now,” Amina sighed.

Keok was interested but was still unable to put its thoughts to words.

Amina turned away. ”Come. If you behave, you can sleep behind the smithy tonight. It's always warm there,” she said to Keok who followed her.

Amina felt strange having the spirit follow her, but it wasn't threathening, and she felt a little bit sorry for it because it couldn't speak. She led it behind the smithy and made sure no one could see it. She also made Keok promise that it would leave in the morning before dawn as soon as the light started to increase.

Keok agreed to her request and bowed to her.

Amina went home tired. Her muscles were tense from the cold and excitement, her mind empty and drained after the long day meeting people, talking and getting to know them. Amina fell asleep immediately.

***

During the next few days Amina was exasperated with Praie's behaviour and blamed her meeting with Keok for it. Praie was constantly trying to get to Kragu, and Amina was powerless to resist. She became so frustrated that she ran to her room or out of the house on multiple occasions.

Emma and Kros talked to her calmly from time to time, and she promised and vowed that she wasn't working too hard, as they were about to tell her not to do anything for a while.

One morning, Emma and Kros went out on some errand and asked Amina to look after Kragu. As soon as they had left the house, Amina realized she was holding the baby. She was terrified and tried to regain the control over her body. The baby slipped from her hands as Praie lost its control over her muscles, and Kragu was about to fall on the floor, but Amina managed to snatch him in mid-air.

Amina was frozen with horror. What she had feared the most had just happened. Because of Praie, the boy was about to get gravely injured. Amina placed the baby in his cradle carefully and sat down at the table.

”Why we not look at the baby?”

Amina sighed, infuriated. She was not in the mood to listen to the nonsensical babble of the spirit. Of course she wanted to get to know the baby, but not in the way Praie was doing it. She wanted to know the person Kragu would grow up to be. Amina made a painful decision and cried for a long time. She would tell Kros and Emma as soon as they would get back. Before that, she tried to calm down. She walked up to the cradle and picked up the baby. She hummed some of the familiar songs to him. Then she put him back in the cradle and began to tell a story which her parents had told her from an early age.

Kros and Emma came back in the middle of the story and found Amina mumbling on her knees next to the cradle.

Kros smiled. ”Are you already making him a Fatil?” he asked, teasing.

Amina smiled a little. ”I'm sorry, little cousin. You'll here the rest of the story some other time,” she said and stood up on her numb feet.

”Is everything allright?” Emma asked as she sensed Amina's sombre mood.

”I almost dropped Kragu,” Amina moaned and burst in tears.

Kros hugged her, not knowing what to say. ”But luckily you didn't. I'm sure it was an accident. Don't worry. He's just fine.”

Emma picked up the baby. ”I'm sure everyone as far as the Great Roundabout would've heard if he'd gotten hurt,” she tried to console Amina.

Amina managed to regain some of her composure. Praie wasn't helping her calm down. It was very quiet in a far corner of her mind. Maybe it finally realized – even though it was too late – that Amina had been serious about the baby's safety from the very beginning. ”I'm going away,” she said.

Kros and Emma were shocked.

Amina took a deep breath and explained her decision before either one of them had a chance to say anything. She had been worried for a while now about all the dirt she brought into the house after playing with her friends and she didn't want to make the baby sick. She knew she was a burden even though she helped with the housework the best she could. She was also determined to make sure – as Kros refused to use the money they got from the story leather – that they wouldn't be the only ones spending money on her. She strongly believed that it would be beneficial for her to live somewhere else for a while and see a little more of the world. She added that this was only temporary as she loved them and her room too much to leave for good. She'd come back as soon as Kragu was old enough to walk on his own two feet so she wouldn't have to carry him anymore.

Kros let her finish. He sighed. ”It's true that your life costs some money, but everyone's life does – especially children.You are not and have never been a burden to us and we love you very much. If you really want to go somewhere else for a while, you may. But not because you're a burden. Only, if you want it yourself. I can write to some relatives tomorrow but I want you to sleep on this first. Tell me this in the morning with as much conviction as tonight if you can, and I'll believe you,” he said with a serious face.

Amina nodded.

Kros kissed her on the forehead. ”I don't want you to go away if you think you're a burden. You are very dear to us. You are part of our family. You are important to us,” he repeated.

Amina smiled a little and wiped her wet cheeks on her sleeves.

In the morning Amina was still mad at Praie. In honesty, she didn't want to go, but she didn't want to give in to the spirit even once anymore. She told Kros she was still determined to go. It would take a couple of weeks to settle the matter with letters in any case.

Kros wrote to the descendants of his great aunt who lived on the western edge of Armaran.